Samhain

Samhain is my very favorite Sabbat. I enjoy decorating and I love to set up my ancestor altar. It is fun to pull out my decorations and put them up and put the things out that remind me of those gone too soon. Those who have left this life and that I miss dearly. I am also excited because my partner is now pagan and this will be his very first Samhain. I am happy to be able to share it with him. The littles like to also participate in the ancestor ritual.

So we have finally been able to get the oldest's meds filled after having to wait since Friday of last week. I am not even sure how he is going to be on them. I am a bit worried because he has never been on one kind of meds well since he was seven. I am hoping that it works out for him. I am hoping also to get him back to school on Thursday. This special needs journey has lots of mountains and winding roads but we seem to get out pretty good on the other side more often than not. It has been a very emotional two weeks for me. I hope that things will settle down soon. I will be looking into homeschooling alternatives in case we have any more issues. I hope that it does not come to that because he really likes to be with his friends. 

 I am going to keep it short today as I am cooking dinner at the moment and need to clean up the kitchen but wanted to check in. 

The winding road called life

So I know that I have been quiet but we had our first hospitalization for my oldest. He had an incident at school and it was very traumatizing for me. I have horrible anxiety and was shaking for three days. He raised a fist to a teacher and reared back like he was going to hit her. The school called the police and me and it was a huge ordeal. I pretty much had no other choice in the matter. I have been mostly trying to recover from that and him being gone for a week in a behavioral hospital two and a half hours from home. I mean I am thankful that they accepted him as this was the only option I really had. I am now keeping him home tomorrow as I have not gotten his meds straightened out yet. So much stress lately has made me just want to lay in the bed and hide under my blanket. I know that is not something I can do. But I sure would like to. This whole adult thing is so not what it was cracked up to be. 

So now we are working on getting everything back to our "normal". I am still working on our minimizing our junk. It is a very long process so far. I can see the differences in some parts of the house and not in others. I know that it is supposed to help but sometimes I wonder what I got myself into. I think so far the biggest issue is clothes. When you have five people in the house plus blankets and such for the ferrets it builds up quickly. 

I finally was able to get my second reborn. Her name is Serenity Moon. She is the cutest lil thing. I am grateful to have both of them. They have helped so much with my anxiety. I was unsure of how it would be when I got them but they are so worth it. It gives me something to look forward to every morning getting them dressed up and taking pictures for the groups I am in. It is fun and helps me to relax. I would recommend them to anyone that was looking into it or that is just not too sure about them. I think they are wonderful. Plus it is fun to do stuff with my two girls and their babies. They like to dress them up and to make them do poses and such to post in groups as well. I did have my first negative response to them the other day. It really did not bother me. I laughed because just before I told her the babies were mine she was saying she wanted a reborn.

New Things

Soooo, I have some new ideas for crafting that I am going to be working on. I am very excited to see it come to life. I have found that I have a passion for everything Reborn. I would like to start sewing and creating things for the babies. I think that my creative abilities will flow quite well with this new idea for me. I like to create and I think that it will not hurt my hands like most of the things that I have tried. 

Source unknown 

 We recently acquired two more ferrets. I think I may have mentioned that already but today I have them out for their play time and they are the most entertaining little creatures. They are also a blast to play with. I find it funny that I find entertainment in the littlest things. I suppose that is a good thing.

I have not had an anxiety attack since I received Phynix. I am really proud of myself on that. I really have enjoyed having her and am trying to not be so impatient waiting for her sister to get here. But she will not be here until next week. I keep checking tracking but they have not updated it since Saturday last week. She is the cutest little thing just looking at her makes me smile. 

Source: Paradise Gallery.com

The purging process is still ongoing. I am taking some things to donate today. I finally have the kid's rooms set up the way I want them. I worked in the oldest's yesterday. It is quite nice to get almost all of my house work done within the first couple of hours after the kids are gone off to school. I say couple hours because I am still working on purging. I am still working through things that have been stored or thrown in a bin and ignored. I went through my toy collection yesterday. I was able to part with a couple funkos that I really did not care for in the first place but I got them through a monthly subscription box. I think I am progressing well with letting go of things. I have to work on letting go of more coffee mugs. But I like them so much I do not want to. 

So to end this life gets rather busy and I forget to write but I try my best to keep it updated. I hope everyone has a wonderful week.

~Keep it Magickal~

A little more about me

So I thought that I would share more about myself and my family. I have a mini zoo of animals a lot of them are rescues that were only supposed to be here for a short time. We have yet to find homes for them. We have ferrets, a couple rats, a guinea pig, and a whole gang of dogs and cats. I have a soft heart for animals have my whole life. It gets me in trouble sometimes when people know that I do and drop off animals at my house. I love them all and take care of each one. 

I am currently learning about my mental and physical illnesses. I have been determined by years end to know what is going on with me. My health has declined and my mental health has not been much better. My anxiety can be overwhelming at times. I am seeking professional help. I see a counselor once a week. 

So speaking of anxiety I have recently purchased a reborn therapy doll. I am hooked. I love her! It does help a lot more than I thought she would. I thought it would be a fun hobby that I can do with my littles as they still love their babies. She is so cute and fun to dress up. I like to hold her as well as she is weighted. I think I also have some sensory issues as well I like weighted blankets and such they calm me.

I am a big nerd I love things like Dr. Who and Sherlock and for sure Supernatural. I like to roleplay through facebook groups. I think that everyone should have a creative outlet. I know that it for sure helps me. I am slowly developing my story telling skills. The kids seem to find it entertaining. But that is all for today do not want to go on and on.

~Keep it Magickal~

The Purge

So it has begun! I feel like I will never get to the end of it. I have been going through and purging all the extra crap that we have in the house and I have come to notice....we have way too much stuff. Entirely too much clothing and just stuff in general. It has not been too hard to get rid of things so far. But the thing I struggle with the most is my coffee mugs as they are my favorite but honestly how many does one person need? I am trying my best to get down to maybe four of them. I would need more than just one for company and in case the one I always use breaks.




This is from when I first started. I thought I would publish it even though I did not finish it. 

This Minimization thing.....

Alright, so let's talk clothes. They are my nightmare at this point. I am working on learning about capsule wardrobes. Which would be really easy and great for me and the significant other because we are adults. But the issue is the kids. I mean they are still growing and how in the world do you pare down shirts when they do not wear uniforms at school. This is my current conundrum. I have asked in a couple groups but I am not sure of the answers that I am getting. I have really put a dent in the junk we have that we do not need. I am not saving for later anything that is not useful and for that matter I have not saved anything that I can think of. I know that I have too many coffee mugs but they are my weakness. I have collected them for years and have way too many favorites. Once I have the house purged I will go back and do a second purge to get rid of the excess that I know we for sure do not need but could not part with at first. I feel like we are making head way. I am starting to see the progress that has been made. Normally I am worried because I can not tell when I have cleaned at least that is the way I feel. Now when I have done my daily chores I can tell that I have done them and things are starting to look nice and tidy. Which in turn helps me with my anxiety issues and depression. I do not like clutter and it sets off my anxiety. I worry about people coming into my house i do not let others in. I have to know a person for a while before I am ok with them coming to visit. I also have to know well in advance that they are coming in order to make everything look perfect. Now it is not perfect and looks lived in at this point but I am working on improving it. I think mid next month maybe the end of next month we should have everything the way I want it. My middle little is loving it because her room is staying nice and clean and looks tidy pretty much all the time. It also takes no time at all to clean up. With after school activities she has not had a whole lot of time for anything but homework. So chores are at the bottom of her list. 

Besides all this housework I have been working on broadening my knowledge of other religions or paths. Currently, I am learning about atheism/agnostic. I had never even heard of agnostic before now. Before I became pagan I suppose you could have classified my beliefs as agnostic. I questioned everything. It was really hard to wrap my mind around organized religion and churches. I mean I have gone to church since I was a small child. I have been baptized in the Morman church and then later in life at a Baptist church. I thought I found God in the Christian sense several times only to start questioning everything. I am having trouble with understanding Atheism. I can not seem to understand the concept of lack of believing in any kind of higher power. I am still learning so maybe later in my studies I will understand. I do get the idea that science can answer a lot of the questions with actual evidence to back it up where as religion has not a whole lot except a book or books to back up the stories and lore. I mean with paganism you can not deny nature. It is right there front and center right outside my door. Easy to see and understand. I think that is why I am so drawn to it. 

My partner has embraced his pagan path and the other day we did a ritual together. I am in a group on Facebook that is helping quite a bit to open up my mind to others views on things. I know that it helped him quite a bit and also was the reason for the ritual. We also do a weekly healing and I have been learning about that as well. I had not worked any kind of magic or rituals since starting down my path and now weekly I am. I have been told several times the only thing holding us back when learning about magic is ourselves.